When is Divorce Permissible for a Christian Part 2
I had no plans of making this a two-part series, but I realized I had left a few things out on the first post I did on the topic. I’ll discuss a little bit more about when divorce is permissible for a Christian in this post.
In the last post on this topic1, I mentioned that abuse, neglect, infidelity, and desertion were biblical reasons for divorce. However, I missed one. It’s financial abuse and lack of self-control in spending. If one of the partners has a problem with self-control when it comes to spending, that is a major problem. Money issues are one of the biggest reasons for divorce in the United States, and much of it can be traced back to financial abuse and a lack of self-control when it comes to spending habits.
If a person is spending money behind his or her spouse’s back, it could mean that person is having an affair. Infidelity is a form of a sexual immorality, which is a biblical reason for divorce. The spending could be a result of a gambling addiction. I live in Texas, and casino gambling is illegal except on the Alabama-Coushatta reservation near Livingston, Texas, which is about 50 miles south of where I live.
What should a person if their spouse has no self-control over spending? First things first, confront their spouse over their spending habits. If the spending is a result of an affair, then the person who is being cheated on should demand the affair end, and if the spouses refuses to end the affair, file for divorce. A marriage without trust is doomed, as is any relationship when there is no trust between the parties. If it’s as the result of gambling addiction, the spouse who has the gambling addiction needs to be encouraged to enter into gambling addiction treatment. If the person refuses help, the other person should file for divorce. Getting a new checking account would be a great idea for the person who is not overspending, so they have control over their finances.
The next thing to talk about is financial abuse. When a couple marries and if they combine finances, which is normally what happens, that gives the partners a say to a certain degree in what the other partner spends their money on. However, if one of the partners is controlling the finances of the other partner and telling them what they can and can’t spend money on, that is called financial abuse, assuming there is no overspending and nothing illegal or immoral going on (in those cases, controlling what the other partner spends their money would be appropriate). A person should have freedom to spend their money on things they want to spend their money on, even in a marriage, as long as they are spending within their means and it’s not illegal or immoral. If a partner in the marriage is being told what he or she can and cannot spend money on, and there is no overspending, nothing immoral, or nothing illegal, that person needs to create a new checking account that way they will have control over their own finances, and demand that the other partner stop controlling behavior. If the other partner doesn’t stop the controlling behavior, then the other person needs to file for divorce. God grants us free will, and that free will doesn’t end when a person gets married. It is no loving for a husband or wife to be controlling of their spouses’ finances if there is no reason to be.
In conclusion, as I stated in the last post on this topic, there are legitimate reasons for divorce. The Bible does not teach marriage permeance. Again, as I stated in the last post on the topic, divorce is not a sin as long it is for a biblical reason.
Again for more resources regarding abuse and divorce go to Gretchen Baskerville’s website thelifesavingdivorce.com and Sarah McDugal’s website WILD, which is wildernesstowild.com (in fact, there’s a whole host of resources on her website).
https://thepentecostalwesleyan.substack.com/p/when-is-divorce-permissible-for-a